Fail

Failure is bliss. I know. In the eyes of many, I am a constant and complete failure. I am. Thankfully. I fail at everything, eventually, either because I’m truly bad at it, or because I decide I no longer want to succeed at whatever the endeavor is. But, not to get too preachy, it is in failure that we learn, it is in failure that we often find the joy we seek. Failure is bliss.

I failed. I failed at the whole single, online dating, playing the field, making friends, courting, flirting, dating, and maybe, eventually, finding someone special. Actually, I didn’t fail at it, not at all, I actually quite succeeded at the whole online dating, playing the field, making friends, courting, flirting, dating thing, and, I found someone I think is really special. I’d just intended it to take longer and, thereby, have lots of crazy, hedonistic adventures and sage advice to share with you all! Fail.

Jardin D Fleur

In my failure, I did quite succeed. I haven’t yet got around to taking down my profiles from all the online dating sites. Heck, one I haven’t even finished putting up! I have managed to turn off the banner notifications, the lock screen notifications, the sounds, the bells, the whistles, the chimes, and even the badges, that’s the easy part, I think I did all that at a stop light in rush hour traffic. I still have unanswered messages, winks, match notices, emails, texts, and all kinds of craziness. They shall remain so neglected. So, yes, I guess there was some level of success, even in my failure. Fail.

Jardin D Fleur

And through all of that, something special, someone special, someone I am interested in sharing time with, in embarking on adventures with, in getting to know better, in taking a chance on. And, however success and failure are measured, I’m certain there will be both.

And that’s what it’s all about; taking chances and possibly failing. If you aren’t willing to do that, you aren’t willing to live, because life consists of taking chances and failure. Success can only result from taking chances and failure. Think about it. I know, it makes life sound really scary. It is. Get over it. Fail. You should fail at something, at many things, every, single day. Without failure, how do we even know what success is? How do we know what to do if we don’t know what not to do? Life is trial and error, and then we die. I promise you, the people who appear to have it all figured out, the people who appear most successful, by whatever measure, are first of all, huge failures, are comfortable with being failures, or, are completely miserable. Fail.

If life is comprised of constant failure, how do we hope to find bliss? By knowing our heart and by being comfortable with failure. Fail.

For an example, let’s get back to the topic of dating; I have many girlfriends, single girlfriends, who have their online dating profiles up for years, some who even have their online dating profiles “professionally” done, like a resume or a curriculum vitae, complete with professionally retouched portraits, all in hopes of appearing successful, girlfriends who date sparingly and miserably, always looking for signs of success in their matches, when, really, failure is the only genuine and consistent human trait. How often I have heard the list of successes “required” in potential matches, before even a phone call or a cup of coffee; a certain level of income, a goddam minimum credit score, height, physique, home, career, dietary commitments, religious affiliations, preference in dog breeds, etc., etc. Those aren’t measures of success, nor are they indicative of character, of ability to live, to love, or to experience bliss. They are merely a failed attempt at understanding what makes a person worth knowing, worth sharing time and experiences with. Fail.

I am far more comfortable with people who fall often and know how to get back up, than I am with people who are terrified to fall, have clung on at all costs, and, when they do eventually fall, may not know how to right themselves again. If you get what I’m saying and are looking for a match, might I suggest your online dating profile say something like; “I am a failure, you should be a failure, too. I understand that bliss is about taking chances, smiling, kissing really good, and thriving with failure, you should understand this, too.” Fail.

Life, love, and bliss; taking chances and failing. And, if you find someone you are comfortable with, who makes you smile, and kisses good, who is confident in taking chances and thrives in failure, in life, love and bliss, then, and only then, will you have success in making a match. It isn’t about the other person, it’s all about you. We must grasp the fact that someone else’s perceived success will never provide us with bliss! We should stop seeking success and start flirting with failure, then we will find life, love and bliss, which are so much better than success. Fail.

Seek failure, cherish failure, relish failure, plan on failure, love failure, know failure, because, it’s what we’ve got, and it’s what the good stuff is made of. The only true failure is failing to seek and accept failure; this is called misery. Failure is bliss. Fail.

 

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